Marriage is the boundless unity of two souls and the beauty of their hearts. It persists over social, emotional, physical and moral bond between spouses which signifies the strength of healthy relationship. It’s a legal sanction followed by societies in varied forms based on customs, beliefs and attitudes. The journey of a bride is known to be the most divine and ecstatic phase of life. But the reality of being bullied is hardly accepted by woman as marriage is an important aspect of life to meet. Invisible barriers on every female especially in matrimonial phase brackets her development and enhancement to the end. Prevalence of such heated issue has already been taken a shape of domestic violence against women. Abusing a woman by any means is a crime, violation of human rights and a punishable offence.
Domestic violence among married women signifies culturally-tailored practice faced by majority of woman. The risk factors of such evil may be the age difference, low educational attainment of self and spouse, young age of marriage, having a love marriage versus arranged marriage, additional dowry request from marital family, employment, changes in her own or her spouse’s employment status, residence in a joint family, renting versus owning one’s residence, fewer rooms in the household and shared bathrooms, accepting attitudes toward wife beating, shorter duration of marriage, and spousal alcohol consumption.
On an informal note, it is clearly understood that limiting economic status, disrespecting morals, sexual abuse, control on activities, cropping career opportunities, ignorance, boundation on cultural and social ethos are the basic forms of domestic violence. These are characterised as physical, emotional and economic abuse of woman. Majority is unaware of any offence so practicing this henious evil with no fear and tear. The social chain from a bride to mother-in-law or in-laws confronts similar challenges and has made a ‘revenge-compulsion’ type of system. Acceptance and ignorance are two different parts of the same coin. Accepting bride by ignoring her differences should be the feeling of every humankind. Know that she enters new family by leaving her own parents, family, milk-teeth love, customs and every milestone behind. And on the next move, she confronts an ideological war to make adjustments and changes in her life routine to run the new family with no guilt. Setting barriers, blocking roads, disrespecting her views can lead human brain nowhere accept uncivilized society. Unethical, immoral family rules persisting over decades give no place to woman’s identity, leaves no honour to her dignified life. The role of patriarchy is somewhere responsible for domestic violence against women in any form. And with no shame, woman plays her experience on another innocent by wearing the mask of in-laws weirdness. Consequently, the torment of mental stress, physical injury, social burden ruining the lives of every second married woman. To save the daughter from dropping into devil’s mouth, parents get bounded to practice female foeticide, infanticide and other criminal activities. Domestic violence is a wrongful act which gives birth to other violent misdeeds at large.
The causes and consequences of barriers in marriages weakens the cornerstone of familial stratification, relationship and lineages. An alarming hour needs to erase traditionally tailored customs and cultural biases to cut the crap. Apparently, the base of female foeticide and infanticide emerges due to the domestic violence against women by considering her a burden on parents and society. Lack of legal knowledge, unawareness of human rights violation make people comfortable to suppress woman especially at in-laws house.
Domestic violence against women affects the quality of life not only of both participants, but also their children. It has now become a major social problem and one of the most widespread violators of the human rights. This problem is still under-acknowledged in families, perceives as a part of daily routine. Bereaving ones liberty is a harm to human dignity and a transparent humiliation. It violates Right to equality (Article 14), Right to Life and personal liberties (Article 21) etc of Indian Constitution. Government has initiated the cause to curb down the ratio by forming legal laws and acts for this punishable offence. The one who is proven guilty can put behind the bar with fine and punishment.
Marriage recognizes no barriers. It climbs over hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hopes. In-laws play greater role in uniting the empire with love and bind the souls together. They should let there be spaces in spousal lives, know their personal premises to non-interference. And they should let the winds of the heavens dance between newly Weds forever. Non-judgemental attitude of in-laws can bring happiness to all. Blooming buds in the hearts of rejoicing family can make the strongest bond of affection. It will create the beautiful moving sea between the shores of two souls. Unless the notion of inequality, humiliation and differences is absent, the wave of happiness will always flow.
-S.Shireen